Friday, February 10, 2017

30 Things I Learned By 30

As cliche as it is I couldn't resist reflecting on my life when I was approaching 30 and writing about all the things I've learned thus far. The big day was Tuesday and it was such a great day! Thank you all for the birthday wishes and tweets and messages, it means so much to me! When I was thinking of what I wanted to write it was almost impossible not to feel a little emo. I tried to include some funny ones as well but for the most part I felt really introspective and it felt very cathartic writing these and thinking on all the things I truly have learned over the past 30 years. So here it is, the good, the bad, and the foody, I mean, funny.  

1. Love yourself.
It took me almost 26 years to truly learn to love myself. We are all unique and beautiful and bring something special to the table. Know your worth.

2. Have no regrets.
This one is hard because there are so many places our path could have diverged but I also believe everything happens for a reason. Own your choices, even when you're wrong. Especially when you're wrong so you can learn and grow from your mistakes.

3. Quality not quantity.
With friends, purses, books, anything. I'm definitely a less is more kind of person and really love eliminating unnecessary extras in my life. Y'all know how I treat my TBR :)

4. Travel.
To the next town, next state, next country, next continent. See as much as you can, the world is full of beautiful places. One of my favorite quotes is from One True Loves by Taylor Jenkins Reid and it says, "I had predicated my life on the idea that I wanted to see everywhere extraordinary, but I’d come to realize that extraordinary is everywhere." We all know I love to travel but I love the small moments in everyday life just as much.

5. Be open minded.
About other people, their lifestyles, their cultures, life's too short to be a bigoted asshole.

6. Live YOUR life not somebody else's.
Don't ever let anybody tell you how to live your life. Again, we are all different and want different things. It's nobody's business what you choose to do with your life. 

7. Love fiercely.
Even when you've been hurt. Love with everything you've got.

8. On that note, never feel stupid for being open and vulnerable and getting burned in the process.
As somebody who has had more friendships crash and burn than the average bear, the sting of complete stupidity never lessens. It's hard not to feel like an idiot when you trusted somebody and opened up to them and they spit in your face. But never feel bad about that. They should feel ashamed, not you. Never be ashamed for having the courage to be vulnerable with somebody else.

9. True friends really are almost impossible to find.
My Inner Circle is small but solid. It's taken me so long to find friends I feel know who I truly am and love me for it and not in spite of it.  

10.  Be loyal.
Life's too short to be an asshole. Friends are so hard to find so hold on to them when you find them. My people know they are my people and I might be an asshole but I am their asshole.  

11. Appreciate the little things.
I love the quiet moments in life. Even when traveling, the small moments are my favorite. Sitting in a park, reading a book outside, stopping for a coffee. All these mundane things are what make me so happy.

12. Ordinary is extraordinary and extraordinary is everywhere.
I know I mentioned this above but I truly believe this. Traveling is great and a huge part of who I am but I love being at home just as much. 

13. Truly be thankful that you open your eyes every morning.
I see a lot of pain and horrible situations at work, it's a true blessing just to wake up every morning.

14. And more than that that you can get yourself out of bed and be dependent on yourself.
But seriously. The things we take for granted that we don't realize.

15. Be kind not nice.
I despise the word nice. Actually hate the word. Nice is fake. Kindness is a character trait that is forever.

16. It's okay not to like people and avoid them. It is not cowardice, it's self preservation and avoiding negative energy.
There's a lot of people I cannot stand and I don't feel bad about it. If I don't like you, it probably means you're an asshole and I just have zero time or patience to deal with negativity.

17. Unapologetically be yourself.
You are awesome. Embrace your aweseomness.

18. Know your flaws and own them. We all have them, some come in handy at times, just be mindful of them and work to have them not affect the people around you negatively.
I have zero problem saying exactly what I feel or what's on my mind. Great quality when defending people or standing up for somebody. Not so great when you're that person nobody wants to confront. Double-edged sword, gotta own both sides of the coin.

19. Bronzer is not foundation. 
RIP oompah loompa face circa 2000-2006

20. Work for what you want in life.
I'm a strong believer that you can do anything you want but you have to work for it. Becoming a nurse, traveling the world, it wasn't easy but it was worth it. Every sacrifice was worth where I am right now.

21. Surround yourself with good people.
Life's too short for assholes, are we sensing a theme here?

22. Let your freak flag fly. Our differences make us beautiful.
High Lord in the street, Illyrian Warrior in the sheets.

23. It's never too cold for ice cream.

24. Family is everything. Whether by choice or by blood, keep those you love close by.
Good people are hard to find, love your people hard.

25. Books are magical. Read everything you can.
This is just a fact of life. Books change lives.

My last 5 points are where I get real emo and reflective about myself...bear with me.

26. I learned I can make it on my own.
I can move across the country by myself, multiple times, and not only survive but thrive. Changing jobs every few months and flying by the seat of my pants is never something I thought I would ever accomplish, let along enjoy. I'm not one to toot my own horn often but moving multiple times across the country and kicking ass is something I will be forever proud of myself for doing. Digging my heels in and forcing myself out of my comfort zone to do something I always dreamed about doing is still unbelievable to me.

27. I don't know when this happened but I somehow became one of those fiercely independent and self-motivated people I used to envy. 
I became a woman that I hardly recognize but in the most positive way. I am loyal and strong and independent and I don't know how I became this person who can rely on herself with the utmost confidence. I don't know when that happened but I am grateful for it.

28. I learned I can travel solo and feel at ease with nobody's company but myself.
If you told me 10, 15 years ago that as a 30 year old woman I would have an almost full passport, lived in 5 different cities, and did it all by myself I would called you insane. But here I am. A person who books plane tickets like people shop on Amazon. Who thrives in the chaos of the unknown.  

29. I learned that Life takes you on an incredible journey that you don't always ask for but it's what you need...
...and I can't wait to see where the next adventure takes me.

And finally...
30. Life's short, eat the cake.


  1. I love and agree with so much of this!! I've been off Twitter most of the week so I don't think I said it, but happy belated birthday! <3

    1. Thank you so much, Lauren!! I always look forward to seeing your name come up in my comments!!


    There are so many things I've learned in life, and I have a couple more years before I'm 30, but the biggest thing I've learned and have encouraged others to try is your #15 and #16: kindness is different from niceness (yes I will assist you, no I will not do it for you), and you don't have to like or be liked by everyone. Y'all, negativity takes way too much time and energy. Get the bad juju out the second you feel it.

    1. Thanks, Laura!!! You're the best and agreed!! Be kind and goodbye negative energy! Be gone!

  3. I adore you, Kel. I'm so glad that you're one of my friends <3 A lot of the things you highlight in this post are truths that I ride and die by, so I love it a lot!


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